The holiday season is here, and many men and women are thinking about what to get their significant others. Gifts, diamonds, and travel are all things that cross the mind of those hoping to impress their beloved. However, men who want to stand out in a woman’s mind can make a big impression with small gestures of affection.
It’s truly the thoughtfulness of the gift that counts — especially when he thinks to do something no man has done before, like give her flowers.
A recent study performed by the ProFlowers team showed that more than 60% of young women aged 18-24 said they had never received flowers from their current significant other. Only 39% of respondents confirmed they had ever received flowers from the person they are currently dating.
The study, conducted with the Google Consumer Surveys tool, asked young women in relationships the question “Have you ever received flowers from your significant other?” 1378 young women aged 18-24 responded, with 838 saying that they hadn’t, and only 540 saying they had.
In an age where relationship status is announced via status update, it can be hard for both men and women to know the acceptable etiquette for courtship. Is there a place for real world chivalry in the world of digital dating?
“Chivalry is not dead, but it’s just barely breathing,” Amanda Wozaldo, founder of relationship blog The Dating Stylist, confirms. “Men think different than women and they don’t always realize that being a gentleman is a major turn on for women.”
Relationship expert Dr. Jennifer Gill Rosier, Ph.D. believes the decline in chivalry is caused by a lack of understanding. “Romantic gestures may seem like they are hard to come by, but the desire for them are alive and well! I think men and women want to be romantic, but they are still unsure how they can go about it,” she explains.
In other words, men who understand the importance of romantic gestures are ahead of the game. And, everyone else can learn.
A Rebirth in Chivalry
“I was not always chivalrous and had to have another gentleman remind me of it,” says John Rasiej, founder of Bring Back Chivalry. “I look forward to seeing a rebirth of it, including gestures such as giving flowers, that women so appreciate and which can form the backbone of a warmer, more caring and longer-lasting relationship.”
Irina Baranov, personal coach and relationship expert, believes any decline in chivalrous behavior is temporary. “I predict that we’ll see the pendulum swing back. I think people will start to crave more … and we’ll see a return to some old-fashioned behaviors.”
Others, like comedian Dan Nainan, see no need to wait for the pendulum to swing. He says there is a misconception among men “that women should only get flowers on a special occasion. … I disagree completely. She should get flowers at random intervals, when she is least expecting them!”
It’s that attitude that makes some men stand out from the crowd, and makes 39% of women happy to be in the minority.